


I'll see you soon, my dear

by L_Ackerman



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Depression, F/M, Levi Ackerman - Freeform, Loss, Love, M/M, Suicidal Thoughts, Unrequited Love, attack on titan - Freeform, poem
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-12
Updated: 2018-10-17
Packaged: 2018-12-01 11:07:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 1,839
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11485089
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/L_Ackerman/pseuds/L_Ackerman
Summary: Eren has had to watch Levi ignore him and his feelings for 7 years now, he has had enough...This is written in the form of poems, written chapters and letters





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is just a quick thing as I haven't posted in over a year..

Dear Levi,

Today you got married to the love of your life  
I guess I didn't know she'd end up as your wife  
My heart aches for you yet you cannot be reached  
The bond between you two now cannot be breached

It's been seven years yet you pushed me aside  
I wish I could have known why you lied  
Why you lied to me that day under the tree  
You lied when you said you'd fallen in love with me

So now as I write this final goodbye  
I guess I'll leave you one last lie  
I won't miss you and I won't wait around  
This gun, this bullet, won't even make a sound

I'll see you in the other side when you're old and grey  
I'll always cherish what you said to me that day  
But still I wish that your conscience stays clear  
I'll see you on the other side, my dear...

Eren x


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levi finds Eren's note and responds immediately having felt bad for him

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This isn't even that good, sorry

Dear Eren,

To think that you would feel so sad  
I won't lie and I'll admit I'm mad  
I loved you once upon a dream  
It was nice, we sat, I loved you so much I wanted to scream

I knew that we could never be  
I knew that you could never love me  
I learned to move on and to love another  
I came to think of you as a younger brother

I'm sorry I caused you all this pain  
I beg you to not put that bullet in your brain  
You'll hurt Armin, Mikasa too  
I could name them all but there a quite a few

Petra is great but you're still better  
I never imagined you would write that letter  
My feelings are hurt but so are yours  
I am looking for you, I broke down all the doors

 

Now I hear that you are under our tree  
I now know that's where you go when you're free  
If you're not already gone and find this letter  
Know that what I did was for the better

Meet me under our tree tomorrow morning while it's light  
I bet you'll look beautiful in the early sunlight  
I'll see you again, while the sky is clear  
I'll see you soon, my dear

Levi x


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren meets Levi under the tree as planned but certain events turn the meeting sour...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First written chapter, it is very short but I did this on my phone so I'll post something longer next time, THIS IS SO BAD, I'M SO SORRY GUYS!!!!!

It was the early hours of the morning when the young brunette awoke to the sounds of the birds chirping outside his window, this was it, this was his last chance to tell Captain Levi how he really felt and how he wanted nothing more but to hold him close in the late hours of the night while the rest of the world was asleep. It would be just him and Levi, forever. Well, that's how he wishes it would be but he knew it was nothing but a childish fantasy built on one afternoon seven years ago, his heart was clinging to the memories of a kiss that he wasn't even sure meant anything to the man he loved. 

Eren slowly sat up in his bed and rubbed his eyes, the sun was rising over the trees in the horizon so he knew he didn't have much time to collect his thoughts before he head out to the tree where they shared their first, and only, kiss. It wasn't long before Eren was up and dressed in a shirt and some old trousers that had rips in a few suggestive places, he took one final look in a mirror and head out into the gardens, it was still too early but he was too nervous to sit around doing nothing. 

About an hour past and the wind was starting to blow violently though the trees, Levi was more than twenty minutes late, this wasn't like him at all. Was he okay? Did he back out? It wasn't long before Eren was nervously pacing around the tree not noticing Levi standing in the shadows watching him with his usual monotone expression, he didn't understand why Eren was so nervous, it was just a talk, nothing more and nothing less. Levi eventually got fed up with watching Eren almost pass out from nerves and slowly walked over to the tree, he sighed and tapped Eren on the shoulder "Hey, Eren". Eren looked like he had just seen a ghost as he suddenly went very pale at the sight of the raven haired man "Oh, Levi! You were a little late so I...um, I got worried" Levi rolled his eyes and pulled out the crumpled note Eren had left him after his wedding, he handed it to him with slight anger in his eyes, he wondered why Eren left it for him after his wedding when he knew that he would want to spend time with his new wife. This was awkward already, both men knew that this wasn't going to end well but they still wanted to try and make peace "So, are we here to stand awkwardly or are we here to talk?" 

It was starting to get very chilly with the fierce winds still blowing recklessly through the air, Eren was mesmerised by how Levi looked with the wind rushing through his hair, he walked closer to Levi wanting to get a better look at him and he tripped and fell over one of the tree roots straight into Captain Levi's crotch, he didn't move for a couple of seconds due to the overwhelming embarrassment of the situation, he was never going to forgive himself for being so clumsy, when he eventually moved he could almost see a blush form on the older man's face before he was launched into the tree by one of Levi's signature kicks. He hit the tree with a thud and almost blacked out, it was only when he was pulled up by the collar that he realised that he was inches away from Levi's face, this could be his chance, he could express his feelings in the best way possible, this was it, the moment of truth.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Guess who's back?! It's me! This is a very short chapter and it's shorter than the others but I am currently in college and doing this on my phone as I was freaking out that I hadn't updated in a while...Sorry, it's also poorly written haha

Eren was standing there in front of Levi for what seemed like an eternity, he was completely lost in the older man's eyes, they had a colour which was impossible to describe by anyone other than the man himself. The mix of grey and blue was mesmerising, Eren was completely under Levi's spell and he had no intentions of breaking free. After was seemed like a lifetime Eren pressed his lips onto Levi's, almost instantly Eren was lost in the kiss, him and Levi fit together perfectly. 

Levi soon pushed Eren away from him and started raging at him and asking why on earth he would do that, he was shocked to say the least. It wasn't until Eren was crying that he stopped shouting and stated walking away

Eren saw Levi walking away from him and his heart shattered into a thousand pieces, it was like Levi had impaled him straight through his already broken heart. This was too much for Eren to take, he had been completely broken and was fed up of Levi playing games, it was then he decided to tell Levi exactly how he felt

"Levi! Levi, come back right now! I demand you to come back! Stop being such a coward and face me!" 

Levi stopped instantly and swiftly turned so that he was facing the brunette, his gaze shot daggers into Levi's soul and in that moment he was completely defenceless against the younger male and spoke in a way that was soft but conveyed months of anger in his voice "What is it now, Eren"

The lighter haired male looked down at the ground and fiddled aimlessly with his hands, he couldn't bare to look the captain in the eyes. After a while he spoke with tears leaking from his eyes and his voice broken and shaking

"The softness of your lips on mine was too hard to describe, it was like I had found paradise in another person when I was with you, all my sadness and depression seemed to melt away entirely. We moved together effortlessly, we knew it wouldn't last forever but in that moment we acted like we believed it would, we smiled, we laughed, we just worked. If we had stayed together we could have been great, we could have ruled the world, me and you together, no one could stop us. I loved you and I thought you loved me so just give in and say you miss me. I'm begging you, even if you lie, just tell me you miss me and that you want me again. Lie to me, and tell me you love me..."


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I posted a chapter last year saying this wouldn't be continued but recently my depression has got so much worse and I need a way to escape so here we go...another shot....
> 
> It's like the shortest chapter ever but it's just to get back into the flow of things haha...

Levi stood speechless staring at the younger male, his mind was racing, thoughts crowded his head and left him unable to form words, 'Why is he telling me this now?', 'Why didn't he tell me before I was married?'.  
He just stood there, the wind blowing through his hair forcing it to move slightly to the right so it covered a small part of his face, he wanted to scream, he wanted to run away but instead he stood there expressionless not able to convey any emotion as he was too overwhelmed. After a short while, he finally found the words to say to him even if it wasn't enough to comfort him

"I'm sorry, Eren... I loved you once and I wanted to give my life to you, but it was too risky. You being the key to reclaiming Wall Maria, it could mean you get killed or it could mean I get killed trying to protect you and I know it's selfish but I wasn't willing to love you fully knowing you might die..I didn't want to get hurt and lose someone else I love, and knowing I might die..I didn't want you to go through that pain either.."

"Levi..." Eren stood there tears streaming down his face, he had never heard Levi talk like that, it was the first time he had heard Levi express his feelings to him, it's the first time Levi explicitly said to him that he loved him in person. he wished more than anything that he would walk over to him and take it all back, just tell him that he loved him and he wanted to run away with him, he silently prayed and closed his eyes trying to stop the tears. A small hand on his shoulder snapped him back to reality, Levi had walked over to him and was inches to his face and Eren longed for nothing more but to kiss him once again then Levi moved his head over to his ear and whispered softly

"I can't say I don't love you fully anymore, as then I would be lying. However, I can say that I can't chase you or be with you, it's time for you to let go Eren...

Eren watched as Levi walked away from him slowly, falling to his knees barely whispering the older mans name into the wind 

"Levi...you can't...."


End file.
